The Right Combination

I'm working my last night shift before going into the supervisor position in two weeks, and I'm remembering why rotating shifts are miserable. But I have gum! I was munching on the cheez-its in my desk drawer, and kept putting the box away, pulling it out again. Reached into my purse for something and found gum! My savior. My mouth is now occupied (and minty fresh) so the cheez-its can remained undisturbed in my drawer. I took the day off from working out because I was achy when I woke up this morning. Bleh. I forgot my water jug when I left the house for work last night, and my body was screaming for water today- I'm working on my second jug for the day without even trying, and will likely have a third in before I leave in the morning. It's amazing to me that my body so quickly became accustomed to the water again, and how I felt when I didn't have it!

Mother Nature has arrived today, which might explain why the scale still hasn't budged. Tomorrow is WI day for BLBE2 and I was really hoping to log a good loss for the first week! However, I feel like I'm some kind of a safecracker looking for just the right combination to this weight loss safe- I've never factored in AP's in previous losses, and I'm wondering if I need to because I'm staying just about right on with my points and daily workouts, with no difference in the scale. This next week I'm going to eat my AP's and see what happens!

This has been an interesting 24 hours. I blame it on the night shifts (it's soo quiet!) that I've had more time to think about what I'm doing and what part my mind is playing in this journey. My blogging buddies called me out on what I posted earlier, about considering myself unattractive in my goodbye photos. I never thought about what I was saying about myself! I've been thinking about it today as I've seen the comments, and realizing that I do consider myself unattractive, as a baseline. I tried to think back to when I actually thought I was attractive, and let's just say its been a few years. Even I'm thinking, wow. I've always been a connoisseur of sarcastic and dry humor, zero bullshit, tell it like it is. But I've never realized how much I direct that at myself.

Something new to add to my daily to-do list. Stop the negative humor towards myself in its tracks. I didn't realize how much of a part it played in my life, even in off-handed comments. Positive reinforcement has been a goal of mine this final time through the WL journey, but I'm realizing I missed a crucial part of that, getting rid of the negative too.

Thanks to everyone who commented on that- you all are the best!